Anheuser-Busch Says No to InBev

Anheuser-Busch, brewer of Low-Quality American Lagers such as Budweiser and Bud Light, has submitted a formal Rejection of the Takeover Bid proposed by Belgium’s InBev. The Offer of $46 billion US Dollars was made about Two Weeks Ago, but the Anheuser-Busch Board voted against it despite the fact that the offer Overvalued the Anheuser-Busch Stock Price by a significant Margin.

Belgian Cat and Monastic Brewer Jeepers de Vooght applauded the Rejection and encouraged InBev to “streven naar meer traditionele methoden voor het brouwen van het behalen van succes, in plaats van het kopen van lage kwaliteit brouwerijen.”

–The Minister of Information.

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InBev Officially Bids on Anheuser-Busch

Belgian brewing Company InBev has officially made a $46.4 Billion US Dollar Bid to take over Anheuser-Busch, brewer of Budweiser and other Low-Quality American Lagers. InBev is the Maker of dozens of Different Beers, including Stella Artois, Bass, and Others, and is something of a Low-Quality Belgian Brewer that does not use the Traditional Standards set forth by the Trappist Monks and brewed for Generations to Maximize Quality and Flavour.


Jeepers de Vooght, Belgian Cat and Monastic Brewer, opposes the Takeover Bid, as he Worries that it will Decrease overall Opinion of Belgian Beers world-wide. “InBev heeft al tot lagere kwaliteit,” he said today. “Kopen van Budweiser zal alleen maakt het nog erger, en alle Belgische bieren zal lijden.”

The Takeover Bid is expected to be Bitterly Fought by the Busch Family, which has Owned the Company for nearly 150 years.

–The Minister of Information

Belgian Bud

Jeepers de Vooght, Monastic BrewerMonastic Brewer Jeepers de Vooght has noted that he is particularly “amused” by This Story – apparently a Belgian Brewing Company is looking at the Possibility of purchasing Anhauser-Busch, brewer of Budweiser and other Low-Quality American Lagers. De Vooght maintains that the Best Beer is and always has been Brewed in the Ancient Trappist Tradition.

–The Minister of Information